My Place

Back in the bad old days, even when I felt terrible, I always believed that I belonged in school.... or on a college campus anyway. It's what I was good at and what gave me my sense of purpose in life. That's why I considered a career in academia for so long. School was pretty much the only thing I was ever that good at.

However, as I was walking back to class today, something occurred to me: I don't really have that same feeling anymore. I know now that the university is not my place. Of course, that still leaves the big question of "what is my place?" still open, but at least I got this answer before I got in too deep.

I know it's only the end of the second week, but this general lack of interest in school is still sticking around. Granted, I still want to do well and I think what I'm doing is important, but like I mentioned in a previous blog entry, I haven't felt obsessive about it. In fact, when those sort of thoughts pop into my head "do school work now!" I deliberately go out of my way to drive them off. Perhaps it's just a signal for a major change in priority.